Why do I bring this up as the first topic? This series on relationships is aimed towards those in a lasting relationship or those who desire one, whether that be marriage or dating/courting. The idea behind this topic is to help you all strengthen and or develop strong, long lasting relationships. I personally believe in the courtship method for myself although I do not think poorly of dating, it’s just my personal preference. That being said this series is not meant to be a push towards one ideology or the other. I bring up courting because it is the most obvious and traditional method used to get to know someone in terms of preparing for marriage. Because of that aspect, I wanted to touch on the concept of courting to hopefully dissolve any misconceptions about it. 

I also did not want to exclude a demographic of people who may support courting rather than dating, and then feel left out if I only talk about dating. I may mention dating throughout the series but just know that these concepts can apply to either method. There is also a section in regards to boundaries that goes hand in hand with the courting concept.

Please keep an open mind as you go through this series and remember that your relationship is your own personal and dynamic relationship. These concepts are simply meant to be encouragement and or advice, so take and apply what feels valuable to you. But don’t discount something just because it initially seems contrary to your general practice.

So let’s dive in! 

Courting is defined as “be involved with romantically, typically with the intention of marrying.” It is very similar to dating in that they both have the same end goal and the same purpose-marriage. That being said, courting is often seen as a more serious and intentional act. Courting is often done differently than dating. Courting can be handled in many different ways, much like dating can be. 

Dating can essentially be divorce training if you think about it. With dating you are encouraged to try out your options and date as many people as possible until you finally settle on one person. What that teaches us is how to, love ’em and leave ’em, essentially. It is teaching us that if something goes wrong we can just drop them like a hot potato and move on. Which is not how a relationship should be viewed at all. Mind you not everyone treats it that way, in fact some people date like they are courting but call it dating. Whereas in a courtship you are essentially practicing for marriage so you work through your issues, you treat it like a lasting relationship. 

In a courtship the couple is often seen with friends or family, in group settings, this is often done to protect the couple from temptations. Courting can have many variations, it doesn’t have to look the same as another couple’s version of courting. But the intention is always the same; to find out if the other person is compatible for marriage. 

Courting is often more focused on building a relationship that will last. It is often done with biblical principles at the forefront of the couple’s relationship. Courting can be just as fun as dating, you can still go out on dates and have fun. Most people get scared by the thought of courting because they see it as an uptight ritual filled, and old fashioned thing, when it doesn’t have to be at all. I think courting can be whatever you make it. But the main intent of courting is assessing the compatibility for marriage.