I know I’m about to strike a cord and make several people uncomfortable, but it has to be said. Goodness knows it is a huge pet peeve of mine, when I’m talking and someone interrupts me to say their bit or to correct me. But I gotta tell you what, it gets so hard for me to hold back when someone is telling a story and they get all the details wrong so I just want to interrupt and correct the details. 

Something I’ve learned lately from some very wise leaders, is that interrupting your spouse (boyfriend/girlfriend) while they are talking is incredibly disrespectful. To some it may not seem like that big of a deal, but to others it can feel like you don’t care about what they are saying. I have seen this so many times when a spouse is telling a story and the other interrupts with a detail and it continues on like that until the one telling the story finally gives up and tells the other to “just finish the story since you clearly remember it better”. It hurts and ends up causing negativity to come between you.

If the detail or piece of information you would like to add does not change the outcome of the story at all, keep it to yourself. For example, a wife is telling a story and she didn’t mention the day on which said story occurred, yet the husband chimes in to correct her that it was Wednesday, but the actual day of the event has no effect on the story. This just causes unnecessary negativity to come between them. Not to mention, the poor recipient of the story has to sit and listen to what sounds like bickering until the story is over. It’s very annoying and completely unnecessary.

Honestly, unless it is something important that needs to be addressed immediately, then interrupting them is just rude. If they are talking to you and you cut them off mid sentence to respond, not only is it hurtful, but it causes them to lose their train of thought. 

Now I’m not perfect at all, because I have a tendency to think a lot, and if I lose my train of thought, it’s gone. I’m very introspective in that I’m constantly thinking and evaluating situations and conversations in my head. So if I’m having a conversation with someone and they say something that triggers a story or comment in my mind, I want to say it immediately because I know by the time they are done, it’ll be long gone. It’s so hard for me to hold my tongue and wait to say what I have to say. But because I am one of those people who tends to feel offended when they get interrupted, I try not to reciprocate those feelings in someone else so I hold back. This usually means I don’t get to say my part of the conversation. Am I sad about that? Sure! But at least we both walk away from the conversation feeling uplifted and encouraged rather than frustrated and annoyed at each other. I’d rather not say what I wanted than to offend someone and cause unnecessary discord.

Now I know it’s not easy and it’s definitely a habit that will take consistency to break, but I promise you, your relationship will benefit from the initiative. One thing I have learned to do is pick a key word they said that triggered the thought, and hold on to that as you continue to listen to them. A good cue for them to know that you have something to say is to open your mouth or change your body language, this signifies that you have something to add.

In conclusion, it is better to wait and lose your train of thought than to interrupt someone and offend them. If you truly love and value them, you will consider their feelings before your own and be willing to sacrifice for their sake. It’s hard and it takes an abundant amount of self control. But no trivial thing you have to say is worth potentially costing your relationship.